I could’ve let you go,
Escape from this prison you’ve put me on,
Let the pain finish for once and for all,
… but I didn’t, I just couldn’t.

Masochistic me, I’ve told myself many times,
Seems like if I’m looking for more pain,
Instead of running and going away.

Your presence disappears with time,
But when it is about to disappear at all,
I look for you, for it to grow again,
Even though I know it is killing me

Masochistic me when I look at your eyes,
Dark brown, honey river,
Makes me drown, takes my breath,
It causes me pain…. But I like it…

Masochistic me, that’s all I think of,
But this is the only way to know I’m alive,
To know if I have still feelings left,
That you didn’t take them all when you walked away.



*NOTE: Masochistic have two meanings. The one I am using in this poem is ''cause pain to onself''.... Just for those who misunderstood when I post it the first time.

Ana Lia Zaldivar

http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/masochistic-me/