Hans, he voss a hansum man
And far from destitute
Mit plenty money in der can
To pay for weekly prostitute

And zo, he vent to Helga’s den
Down off ze Reeperbahn.
He had a hump der, now an zen
Undt just becoz he can!

“I vant to have der Kinky sex
And thrill you wit mein power”
She slowly opened wide her leks
“Ok but it’s 300 Euros per hour! ”

She led him to ze darkened room
Ver she had taken many boys
Her eyes bulged with a sonic boom
As from his sack, he pulled his toys.

Four big springs with ties to lash
And a plastic duck call thing
He asked if she would have a bash
And he would make her scream and sing

The springs vent on her arms and legs
The duck call in her mouth,
He bounced and banged her, such great sex
1 hour before his old man went south!

“Mein Gott”, she cried. “You shall not pay!
The thrill had made her filled but weak.
“What was that called? ” He heard her say.
He told her, “Four Sprung Duck Technique! ”


(Rhymed version of a classic joke.)

Reece Kaye

http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/hans-off-my-woman/