Crying Baby - Provide Comfort or No? - as part of the expert series by GeoBeats. When a baby arrives into the world, it is a very new experience for them. They are not clear on what is going on. They have been inside somebody's belly, they have been in water, they have had nutrients fed to them without having to do anything. They have not had to use their senses in the same way that they do once they are on the outside. And so, when they are upset, they really need the reassurance of a caregiver to let them know that they are safe. And so it is really important that when a baby is new to the world that we are really tuned in to the fact that when they are crying, that is the only thing they have to communicate what is going on for them. And it is very real and it is very important that we not just tend to them when they are upset, but that we are really bringing our respect and our compassion and our love, and a calm nervous system. So I have created something called "CALMS". It is C-A-L-M-S. And it is a system of being with babies when they are upset. And the "C", it stands for "Check in with yourself". So when a baby is upset or fussy, it is really important as the caregiver that you take a moment to just check in and notice how you are feeling. Because your baby feels how you are feeling. It might not be conveyed in your words, but it is conveyed in the way you are feeling. So if you are stressed and anxious, that is only going to make them feel that things are not quite safe. So, checking in, and then "A - Allowing a breath". That is just going to slow you down, and that is going to communicate to the baby "Wow, you are having a hard time, but I am safe, I know we are okay." And then "L is listen to the baby". So if the baby is upset, it is really not appropriate to go "Oh, you are okay, you are okay, you are okay." Because that is not really listening and acknowledging that they are having a hard time. If they are upset, that is real, they are upset. And so, if you can go "Ooh, you are having a hard time, I really hear you. You are telling me so much. You are crying and you are moving your arms. I am just going to keep settling because we are safe." That is a really different communication for a baby and it really helps them settle. And then lastly, you soothe them. Because they do arrive without the ability to soothe themselves. And so, you've checked in with yourself, you have taken a breath, you have listened to the baby, you have mirrored the baby - that is when the "M" stands for, to mirror, "I hear you" - and then "S" is soothe the baby, which is anything from swaddling them, or taking them outside for a little fresh air, or feeding them, or bouncing them on a big bouncy ball while you hold them. Anything that just brings their system down. But all of the S'es are going to be a lot more effective if you have taken the time to connect with yourself, slow yourself down, and then really listen and connect with the baby.