There were a couple of stories about public urination we could have animated today. There was the unnamed elderly process server who peed on the driveway belonging to a man she was unsuccessfully trying to serve papers to. Then there's Gregory Clark, who has a 666 tattooed on his forehead and who drained his lizard outside a burrito restaurant in Dayton, Ohio. Gregory Clark, come on down! You win because you have a friggin 666 emblazoned between your eyes and because you live in Ohio.

ABC affiliate WKEF-TV reports that Clark, 38, was spotted peeing on the patio of a Hot Head Burritos on 1113 Brown Street in full view of everyone inside. He then flashed a peace sign and chilled on a bench. An employee called the cops at 5:45pm but when they showed up Clark was gone ... but not for long. He came strolling back with an open container of booze while the cops were writing their report and was arrested. When asked why he peed on the restaurant's patio, Clark reportedly said he really, really had to go and "didn't want to paralyze himself" by holding it. When asked why he came to the patio, he said he wanted to "get high, get a buzz, and play with myself."

Clark reportedly said a man had threatened him and wanted to kill people. But there is no sign of the man in the restaurant's CCTV footage of Clark peeing. He was cited for public intoxication and an open container and booked at Montgomery County Jail pending a charge of public indecency.


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