Firstly he takes the maternity leave for the whole nine months
And he sends his wife to work.
He takes his hidden drinking mug out and sips with full of ideas.
He scribbles on a piece of paper and mimics how he delivers the baby.
He calls his family doctor secretly and explains him about the phobia of the labour pains.
When his wife comes home after work he tells her politely; ' Darling I'll deliver the child safely but you have to accept the pains.'
She cries loudly; ' Oh! My poor saviour still you are in delirium tremens and how long it takes you to reach Shan'gri-La'? '

nimal dunuhinga

http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/if-the-man-gets-pregnant/